Three movies with A Ghost Story, Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets, and Dunkirk. Andy kind of hated A Ghost Story. Rooney Mara eats a pie. Casey Affleck wears a sheet. It’s a boring, pretentious mess. Valerian is visually amazing but has some problems. Dunkirk is amazing, but Andy has some problems with it.
We have a special episode early because it’s SPIDER-MAN! The newest film fits in with the MCU but also is its own thing. It’s really, really great. Funny. No Uncle Ben death– thank you! Teen angst. The Vulture and why he’s awesome. Just give all your stuff to Marvel, Sony (and Fox).
One for the kids and one for the adults as we check in with the further adventures of Gru in Despicable Me 3 and ride along with Edgar Wright’s Baby Driver. If you liked the first two Despicable Me movies, you’ll like this one. Andy sees maybe a subversive message about remakes and nostalgia. The Minions grow tiresome. Baby Driver is phenomenal. Dat soundtrack, tho. It’s a musical, just with car chases, gunfights, and ‘splosions. One of the best movies of the year.
A great movie and a horrible movie with special guest Rich Bonaduce! as we review Transformers: The Last Knight and War for the Planet of the Apes. An inexplicable plot. Stupid action. All characters are stupid. British Megan Fox has a PhD and will remind you about it, but she just needs a man. Mark Wahlberg just needs a woman. Convenient. It’s all so terrible, and so boring. But War for the Planet of the Apes is the anti-Transformers: smart, fun, and has something to say. Great blend of summer action and thoughtful message. We need a palate cleanser– too bad everyone else has to wait until July 14 to see it.
Weird mediocre week with shark movie 47 Meters Down, raunch-com Rough Night, and Cars 3. Drink every time someone mentions The Bends and you will die. Not enough sharks (or scares) in this shark movie. Stupid ending. Rough Night is about women, but in the end the insecure fiance is the hero? Should’ve been more funny given how great the cast is. Cars 3 is terrible for the first hour, then gets kinda good. We spoil the hell out of it, so beware. You can read the written form of Andy’s comments here. The short Lou before the movie is the best part. That we don’t spoil because it’s beautiful.
The Dark Universe has an inauspicious beginning in The Mummy. The first act is good, and as long as it stays about the mummy, it’s good. The shared universe stuff is terrible. Andy and Adam disagree about the ending, but no spoilers. It Comes At Night is suspenseful, not scary. It’s apocalyptic, but there’s no monster.
Joined by Kaitlyn Booth again to school Andy and Adam about Wonder Woman, but first we (briefly) talk Captain Underpants. The first great movie of the DCEU. Why the ‘No Man’s Land’ scene resonates. War! World War I vs II. Born Sexy Yesterday? Now just stick the landing, DC.
Studios try to revitalize once-beloved franchises with Baywatch and Pirates of the Carribean: Dead Men Tell No Tales. Then we take a swear-filled rant about the “controversy” over the women-only screenings for Wonder Woman at the Alamo Drafthouse. And next week a (returning) special guest will join us to talk Wonder Woman! Stay awhile and listen!
Alien: Covenant for the adults and Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul for the kids. Well, certain kids, because there are lots of bodily function jokes in this movie. Kiddie version of The Griswolds. Alien: Covenant is more of a Prometheus sequel than an Alien prequel, but it tries to split the difference with your classic facehuggers and chestbursters, etc. Split. Logan: Noir. Get Out.
We have Snatched and King Arthur this week, and also a look back on Prometheus and how it ties in to Alien: Covenant. We could seriously discuss it for hours, but we’ll just over you the basics– including spoilers for a 5-year old movie, for which we don’t apologize.